The Sexuality of James
by UnicornGiggles
Summary: DONE Which side is James' bread buttered? Which bus is he riding on? The answer is here...


Is James gay? The question on all our minds. A one-shot based on that.

Jesse pressed the back of her hand against James' forehead. It was very warm. "It's no good," she tutted, "you'll have to stay in bed." James looked up at her weakly and mumbled inaudibly. She bent down to hear what he was saying. She smiled. "Of course you can have some cocoa." Ok, let's face it; Jesse isn't exactly caring. But subconsciously, she wants to mother James the way she never was, since she lost hers at such a young age. Later, Meowth chuckled at the way she had run around that day. Like 'a headless chicken', he commented to her in the evening. She grinned knowingly. "The healthier _he_ is, the less work _we_ have to do!" explained Jesse as she made some noodle soup. "Are ya sure dat ain't da only reasan?" Meowth snickered as he reached towards the pot in the hopes of stealing some chicken. Jesse smacked his paw with the ladle. "Get out! You're always trying to stuff your big me-outh!" He licked his paw sombrely. "Dat hoit…" 

                The next day, James was still feverish. Jesse suggested moving him outside of their rented chalet. He whined: said that he wanted to stay where it was warm. Jesse shoved him outside anyway. She made sure that it was a good spot. There was plenty of warm sun for his body, and from the neck upwards he was in the shade. He soon fell fast asleep. Jesse and Meowth saw the opportunity to rest and they were almost immediately sunbathing. "Nice day…" she sighed; lifting her sunglasses away from her eyes and onto her head. There were a few Ledyba and Butterfree feeding nearby. The busy humming was a soothing lullaby for Jesse. She dozed for a while. Occasionally, the splash of Goldeen in the river awoke her. After an hour or two, her eyes could no longer ignore the bright sunlight. Her eyelids fluttered open and she saw Meowth - still cat-napping. Jesse prodded him angrily. "You were supposed to watch James!" Meowth woke with a start. He had to blink a few times before the world around him registered. "No I wasn't. Dat homo ain't nuttin fa me ta worry about."

                "Homo?" Jesse frowned in puzzlement. Meowth realised with horror what he had just said. "Oi mean, as in homo sapiens – human." He prayed that she'd fall for it. No such luck. "You mean he's…"

Meowth scratched his paw nervously. "Well, he neva confessed. But it makes sense…da cross dressing fa instance."

                "But I make him do that. It's so we can steal Pikachu."

                "He didn't av ta be da woman. And oi tink he enjoys it a bit too much." Jesse wasn't convinced. While James slept, she and Meowth made up a list of reasons for and against James' 'weird habits'. 

1. Cross-dressing – he acts like a drag queen and he thinks he makes the 'coooooolest' girl! However, Jesse argues that she dresses as a man, and no one has accused _her_ of homosexuality. Besides, in Japan it is considered _manlier_ if a male dresses as a female. It just means James is in touch with his feminine side. (A bit too in touch, added Meowth)

2. Squealing voice – he's a late bloomer.

3. His fear of women – Jesse admitted that she was harsh towards him and tat probably encouraged his recluse. And the only other women James has been near; one was a dominatrix like Jesse, and the other was a ghost.

4. His teddy bear – he's just a big kid.

5. His good sense of fashion – hmmmmmm. Tricky one. Jesse couldn't think of any male in the fashion business that is or was straight.

6. Dodgy quotes – 'it's times like this, I wish I'd gone straight' and (in reference to the trouble with the opposite sex) ' that's the sort of trouble I stay out of'. Jesse couldn't argue with that. It was a bit suspect.

Meowth was triumphant. He spent the whole day strutting around the place. 

                  James' fever subsided within two days of the illness. Now that James is feeling better, thought Jesse, should I ask him if he's… she could not bring herself to say it. It wasn't that she didn't like gay people: she just wanted to know that if she ever did like him in 'that way', it wouldn't be on a one-way street. She ordered Meowth to pick up some sushi for their dinner. Meowth guessed that she was going to ask him. He winked as he left, "Good luck, Jess!" She scowled after him. Then she composed herself as she prepared to ask James.

                The door slowly creaked open. James glanced up from his crossword puzzle, saw that it was only Jesse, and returned to 34 across. "Jesse, which is the 'sex-change Pokémon'?" Jesse almost choked. She tried to say that the answer was Goldeen, but her mouth was dry. "Are you okay?" He clasped her hand. She looked his un-gloved hand sadly. Was it really any of her business? Would it change their friendship? It isn't good for something so trivial to break up a friendship. But it happens. Could she accept him? She looked into his concerned green eyes. Jesse knew then and there, nothing could affect what they had. "I'm fine." With that, she left. He stared after her. "Strange girl," he muttered. Still feeling cold, he wrapped the blanket around himself and shivered. He picked up his favourite book. 'Guidance For The Millennium Man.' He sighed. "I thought acting gay was meant to attract women!"

The End? (Probably not ^_^)


End file.
